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	<title>Female Care &#187; sex</title>
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		<title>The Infidelity Puzzle:  The Reasons Behind Affairs and Their Consequences</title>
		<link>http://femalecare.net/relations/the-infidelity-puzzle-the-reasons-behind-affairs-and-their-consequences/</link>
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		<pubDate>Mon, 25 Apr 2011 05:50:48 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Article Poster</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Relations]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[bad judgment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dad]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[home]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[intimate relationship]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[male ego]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Mom]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[mom and dad]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[self esteem issues]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[society]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://femalecare.net/?p=1721</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[For hundreds of years men and women have celebrated their unions with commitment and marriage, only to have those promises eventually shattered by a partner&#8217;s cheating ways. It can happen shortly after the honeymoon, or well into the child rearing years, but either way, it can deal a devastating blow to any intimate relationship. Many [...]
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<li><a href='http://femalecare.net/relations/infidelity-what-is-the-definition/' rel='bookmark' title='Infidelity -What is the Definition?'>Infidelity -What is the Definition?</a></li>
</ol>]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>For hundreds of years men and women have celebrated their unions with commitment and marriage, only to have those promises eventually shattered by a partner&#8217;s cheating ways. It can happen shortly after the honeymoon, or well into the child rearing years, but either way, it can deal a devastating blow to any intimate relationship. Many questions arise after an exposed betrayal &#8211; but the most prominent can be &#8211; why did this happen and where do we go from here?  This is where the differences between men and women become less subtle and a little more predictable.<span id="more-1721"></span></p>
<p>When a man has sex with a partner other than his own, he will justify his actions as a reflex or a physical release of tension &#8211; &#8220;It didn&#8217;t mean a thing, its you that I love&#8221;  or &#8220;I had too much to drink and she was throwing herself at me.&#8221; This is because men tend to view love and sex as two separate issues &#8211; the first is long term, whereas the latter is only a momentary , if not accidental, diversion. The affair is usually not meant to last or replace anything existing in his life.  It was simply bad judgment and another stroke to his male ego.  Women on the other hand, view love and sex as a package deal &#8211; each intricately entwined with the other, thus, bringing her emotions into an already steamy picture. &#8220;If you had listened to me or showed me more attention, I wouldn&#8217;t have been so drawn in by his affection.&#8221;  Women also tend to give a little more thought to the future of an affair,  weighing the pros and cons of both &#8220;relationships&#8221; with her heart.</p>
<p>Sometimes the consequences of an affair can be less about the actual relationship being betrayed and more about one&#8217;s impressionable upbringing.  Was there respect between mom and dad, or was there always a lingering sense of regret and blame? Self esteem issues develop early, sometimes creating the need to feel anything besides insecurity. Children watch and learn how to interact with the opposite sex via their role models. If dad disrespected mom, ran around with other women and always came home drunk, a son will probably find himself wearing those same shoes.  If mom strayed herself or simply accepted dad&#8217;s infidelities, then a daughter will probably repeat the pattern herself.</p>
<p>The reasons behind affairs can be quite numerous and complicated &#8211; Although it does seem that a man&#8217;s affair is more acceptable to society because of their lack of emotional expression. After all, boys are raised to be strong and stoic  &#8211; The hunters in our society. If a hunter gets side tracked and arrives days later with provisions, it will be okay, because he has still provided for his family. For women its much more difficult due to her role in creating and grounding the family  home. Girls are raised to be supportive, sympathetic creatures &#8211; The nurturer for the hunter. If the nurturer gets side tracked and returns days later &#8211; the family has been without all support and direction. This could very well be devastating to the clan.</p>
<p>It could seem that men of generations past have gotten preferential treatment when it comes to infidelity.  Yet the fact still remains that females have probably enabled them.  Perhaps subconsciously. By having been historically been prepared early in life to be more flexible and forgiving in all their relationships &#8211; men would have had the upper hand. Its only become more common, recently, to find many independent women who wouldn&#8217;t dream of accepting such behavior from their counterparts. So it would seem, that the outcome after betrayal still vary, based on gender, at such a primitive, basic level.</p>
<p>Related posts:<ol>
<li><a href='http://femalecare.net/relations/infidelity-what-is-the-definition/' rel='bookmark' title='Infidelity -What is the Definition?'>Infidelity -What is the Definition?</a></li>
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		<title>Cheaters, Cheaters, Affair Repeaters</title>
		<link>http://femalecare.net/relations/cheaters-cheaters-affair-repeaters/</link>
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		<pubDate>Mon, 28 Feb 2011 22:58:30 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Article Poster</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Relations]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[bear children]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[behavior]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Cheaters]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dominant partner]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[dominant provider]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[fairy tale]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[maternal figure]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Men]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[way]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://femalecare.net/?p=1535</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Women and men are certainly different in more ways than one. Their appearance is quite different with distinctive physical characteristics. They take a different slant on various topics concerning life. Plus, the world looks at them differently in regard to expectations. A woman, for the most part, is expected to be the loving, maternal figure [...]
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</ol>]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Women and men are certainly different in more ways than one.  Their appearance is quite different with distinctive physical characteristics.  They take a different slant on various topics concerning life.  Plus, the world looks at them differently in regard to expectations.</p>
<p>A woman, for the most part, is expected to be the loving, maternal figure in a family.  Moreover, she is expected to be the more subservient or less dominant partner in the relationship.  The woman is expected to be the more emotional of the two partners, and quite often, she is.  A woman needs love, quite possibly more than she needs anything else.</p>
<p>When a young woman gives herself to a man, she does so for love.  If he dumps her and breaks up with her, she may repine, “I thought he loved me,” or “but he said he loved me.”  <span id="more-1535"></span></p>
<p>A woman tends to grow up with the “happily ever after” fairy tale stuck in her head, constantly searching for her Prince Charming.  Once she finds him, she expects her world to be perfect as she falls in love with her prince, offering him every drop of her undying love.</p>
<p>She becomes emotionally attached and quite rightly so.  Love is an emotional attachment that motivates much of the behavior of a woman.  After all, most women go through life looking for someone to love them, completely and everlastingly.  When a woman finds her mate and settles down, it is for love and for undying love and simply just for love.</p>
<p>A man is expected to be the dominant provider in a family or in a relationship.  He is motivated by his needs and what he believes he needs.  Some men may find a partner based on what it is that she can do for him, such as bear children, keep house, fulfill his sexual needs, rather than because he loves her.  Granted he may love her, but quite often, other considerations sneak into the equation.</p>
<p>If a man becomes cool or distant, even temporarily, to his significant woman, rather than get annoyed with the man, the woman wonders what it is that she did wrong.  If he cheats on her, she wonders why he doesn’t love her anymore.  She becomes devastated and immediately takes on an inordinate amount of guilt, depression, or anger depending on her personal nature.</p>
<p>Some women don’t understand that for a man sex has very little to do with love.  He may still love her.  He may cheat on her, because the opportunity was there and he couldn’t resist.</p>
<p>Unfortunately, the world has raised generations of people who expect the man to cheat more frequently than the woman.  Men are seen as individuals who can act in a disloyal way, have an affair, and get away with it.  The man is motivated by sex and the woman is motivated by love.  It’s a lot easier to have sex with someone than to fall in love with them.</p>
<p>If a man cheats on his spouse or significant other, everyone looks the other way because we have been programmed to believe that it isn’t as bad as it looks, unless, of course, it happens to us.  Men may cheat on their wives or lovers because they have grown up watching other men cheat on theirs.  It is expected- and accepted- behavior at this point.</p>
<p>On the other hand, if a woman cheats on her man, she is called every name in the book.  If she were to counteract and cheat on her spouse, most of the world would look on her with disdain.</p>
<p>Men are expected to be animals that cannot control their urges.  They spout phrases like “she doesn’t mean anything to me,” “it doesn’t mean anything,” and “ it was just sex.”  Then, he expects t be forgiven once he makes the shallow promise, “It will never happen again.  I will never cheat on you again.”  Quite often, he is forgiven, at least temporarily.</p>
<p>On the other hand, the only way that his cheating behavior will never happen again may be if the woman leaves him forever and begins her quest for Prince Charming all over again.  Perhaps that is where the problem lies.  Either she doesn’t leave him or she never finds her Prince Charming because he only exists in a fairy tale.</p>
<p>Granted, the above are stereotypes or stereotypical behavior.  Not every woman is subservient and on a quest for love; and not every man is dominant and on a quest for sex.</p>
<p>Not every woman is more emotionally involved; and not every man is less emotionally involved.  However, male cheaters who have affairs may be looked at by other males in a positive light, whereas females who have affairs are looked at in a very negative way.</p>
<p>Related posts:<ol>
<li><a href='http://femalecare.net/relations/so-he-had-an-affair-how-to-get-over-it/' rel='bookmark' title='So He Had an Affair: How to Get Over it'>So He Had an Affair: How to Get Over it</a></li>
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		<title>Clomid Online</title>
		<link>http://femalecare.net/general-health/drugs/clomid-online/</link>
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		<pubDate>Sat, 18 Dec 2010 12:12:33 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Article Poster</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Drugs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cycle]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[drug efficacy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[female infertility]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[female sex hormones]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[infertility]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[infertility treatment]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[pharmacy]]></category>
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		<category><![CDATA[susceptible cells]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://femalecare.net/?p=1159</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Product Description Our online pharmacy offers Clomid. This drug decreases the quantity of female sex hormones in the blood. Nevertheless, Clomid has been proved to be an excellent remedy for infertility treatment. Branded Clomid is very expensive. Not everyone can afford to buy it, however, the drug efficacy is very impressive. We offer you an [...]
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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong>Product Description</strong></p>
<p>Our <a href="http://store.femalecare.net/">online pharmacy</a> offers <a href="http://store.femalecare.net/item/women_s_health/clomid.html">Clomid</a>. This drug decreases the quantity of female sex hormones in the blood. Nevertheless, Clomid has been proved to be an excellent remedy for infertility treatment.</p>
<p><em>Branded Clomid</em> is very expensive. Not everyone can afford to buy it, however, the drug efficacy is very impressive. We offer you an excellent possibility to buy Clomid Generic available at our online pharmacy. Generic is the exact copy of an original drug manufactured by other pharmaceutical company. Generic pharmaceutical companies buy the right to manufacture a generic drug. Generics are similar to branded drugs by structure and action.</p>
<p>In Europe and in the United States Clomid is available only under prescription as this drastic drug affects the hormones. If you do not want to bother getting prescriptions, you can buy <strong>Clomid online</strong>. Just complete the provided order form at our virtual pharmacy – and you will receive your order within shortest time. At the average, drug delivery term is from 3 days to 2 weeks. The delivery term depends on your location, we provide worldwide delivery.</p>
<p><span id="more-1159"></span></p>
<p>You can pay for <em>Clomid online</em> with VISA and Master Card, as well as with check.</p>
<p>What is Clomid indicated for? As we mentioned before, this remedy is used in hormonal disorders. The quantity of hormones produced in our organism is controlled by complex system. Clomid is characterized by ability to interact with specific sells making hormones affect tissues. The same cells regulate the hormone level in the blood.</p>
<p>Clomid is similar by the structure to estrogens, female sex hormones. It allows to interact with cells sensitive to this hormone. Clomid action depends on estrogen level in an organism. In case of deficiency the drug stimulates their production, in case of overproduction, it inhibits the process. Actually, Clomid is &#8220;antihormone&#8221; as it only binds susceptible cells, but not affects.</p>
<p>Clomid is a very effective drug for treatment of female infertility. Sometimes, disorders in hormonal system may lead to non-maturation of oocytes in ovary, consequently making conception of the child impossible. Under the Clomid action the hormones stimulating maturation of oocytes and ovulation are released. It has been reported that in several months of Clomid use the women unable to get pregnancy for a long time, become pregnant at last.</p>
<p>Clomid can be used in vaginal bleedings caused by disbalance in hormonal systems. In this case the drug treats hormonal disorders and bleedings stop. In contrast to hormonal drugs which also are used in similar cases, Clomid does not cause weight gain and other adverse reactions.</p>
<p>Clomid also can be <em>used in men</em>. Athletes and bodybuilders use the drug quite often. The matter is that under the influence of steroids and other drugs increasing the muscle bulk, female sex hormones can be accumulated in an organism. It may significantly change appearance of the man, even male breasts may increase in sizes. In such cases Clomid helps to manage with adverse reactions of steroid drugs. Besides, it also stimulates production of male sex hormones which stimulate muscle growth.</p>
<p>Clomid is supplied in 50mg pills. For treatment of female infertility the drug is taken once a day after a meal. To provide Clomid efficacy, it should be taken according to menstrual cycle. To be more detailed, you need 5 pills for one cycle which are taken from 5th to 9th day of a menstrual cycle inclusively. It should be noted that the first cycle day is considered to be the first day of menses. If pregnancy has not come during the first cycle, Clomid is taken for 5-9 days of the next cycle. Thus, one pack of the drug is enough for two cycles.</p>
<p>Bodybuilders usually take Clomid in higher doses. At the average they take 100-150mg daily for 10-14 days.<br />
Definitely, Clomid is effective, one of the most efficient drugs in this group. Regular and correct drug use will help to manage with many problems caused by hormonal disbalance. The most important in Clomid treatment is to strictly follow the course and your treatment will be successful.</p>
<p><strong>Clomid Safety Information</strong></p>
<p>Clomid is a drug for treatment of infertility caused by disbalance of sex hormones. Clomid is indicated in some disorders in organism as an endocrine system affects all human organs and tissues without exception.<br />
To provide effectiveness and safety of the treatment with Clomid, you are recommended to strictly follow the treatment course and dosage scheme. Before use, you have to pass a gynecological examination to define the reason of infertility or of uterine bleedings, to reveal any tumors of the female reproductive organs or breast cancer, to check liver functionality. In case of any symptoms of side-effects, immediately stop to use Clomid. Irrespective of any reactions Clomid is not recommended to be taken for over three successive cycles. In case if the drug causes temporal blurred vision or allergic reaction, Clomid is forbidden.</p>
<p>Please, be aware that Clomid treatment increases the chance of the concept of twins.</p>
<p>Clomid is to be stored in a cool, dry, dark place for five years.</p>
<p><strong>Clomid side-effects</strong></p>
<p>Clomid is an effective drug for treatment of female infertility. It affects the quantity of hormones in an organism, consequently, drug use may cause a number of side-effects.</p>
<p>As Clomid stimulates maturation of follicles in female ovaries, it may cause increase in ovaries. It causes constricting pains or uncomfortable feelings in some women at the bottom of the stomach. Besides, increase in hypophyseal hormones level may lead to breast swelling.</p>
<p>In rare cases it has been reported other side-effects of Clomid associated with changes of hormonal background. Clomid may cause sleeplessness, nausea, vomiting, dizziness, or headache. Allergic reaction to this drug type may cause dermatitis.</p>
<p>Clomid is counter-indicative in case of unexplained vaginal or uterine bleedings, in new tumors of genitals, breast, or endometriosis. As the drug is metabolized by the liver, those suffered from hepatic pathology should take extra care. Clomid is strictly counter-indicative for pregnant women.</p>
<p>At our online pharmacy you can buy Clomid in any quantity and without prescription. Drug delivery is possible at any place around the world within the shortest terms.</p>
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		<title>Nolvadex Online</title>
		<link>http://femalecare.net/general-health/drugs/nolvadex-online/</link>
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		<pubDate>Fri, 10 Dec 2010 12:34:02 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Article Poster</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Drugs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[endometrium cancer]]></category>
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		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://femalecare.net/?p=1171</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Product Description You can get without prescription a unique drug Nolvadex at our online pharmacy. It affects circulation of hormones in the organism. It is not an over-the-counter drug and is not available without prescription, at least, in the most of countries around the world. Meanwhile, Nolvadex is rather popular drug and though it is [...]
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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p><strong>Product Description</strong></p>
<p>You can get <em>without prescription</em> a unique drug <a href="http://store.femalecare.net/item/women_s_health/nolvadex.html">Nolvadex</a> at our <a href="http://store.femalecare.net/">online pharmacy</a>. It affects circulation of hormones in the organism. It is not an over-the-counter drug and is not available without prescription, at least, in the most of countries around the world. Meanwhile, Nolvadex is rather popular drug and though it is designed to affect the female estrogen balance, it can be used not only by women, but men as well.<br />
You can <strong>buy Nolvadex</strong> at our online pharmacy without prescription. Nolvadex is available absolutely freely so you will not need to pass medical examination before use. The process of purchase Nolvadex online is very simple. Few minutes are required for you to complete the order form, and then the drug will be delivered at your place by mail as soon as possible.</p>
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Our online pharmacy offers worldwide delivery, any distances is not a problem for us. You can pay for your selected medicinal product with your VISA or Master Card. We accept check payment as well.<br />
We propose to get Nolvadex, a drug designed in accordance with license of the company-manufacturer. Generic does not differ from the branded drug, except the price. The price is lower, as company should not pay for a brand.<br />
Nevertheless, before to buy Nolvadex online, you should carefully learn the drug information.<br />
As we have mentioned before, Nolvadex influences the female sex hormones (estrogen) level in the body. To be more exact, it reduces the quantity of estrogens, interacting with the specific cells responsible for estrogen level in the blood.<br />
What for to reduce an estrogen level? Nolvadex is often used for treatment of different tumors developed under the influence of these hormones. First of all, it is a breast cancer which develops in women in menopause period. An ovary cancer and an endometrium cancer are curable with Nolvadex. Besides, there are certain tumors which are not related to reproductive organs, but depend on female sexual hormones: kidney cancer, melanoma, and sarcomas.<br />
Another action of Nolvadex is a stimulation of other hormones production. They cause growth of follicles in ovaries and lead to ovulation. As a result, the women suffering from infertility due to hormonal disorders get a good chance to become pregnant.<br />
Nolvadex can be used in men. The drug offers two fields. First of all, Nolvadex helps in prostate gland cancer, and in such rare disease, as male breast cancer. This may not be revealed till removal of the testicles. In this case an unusual tumor can be observed.<br />
However, more often Nolvadex is used by those men involved in bodybuilding. To provide the growth of muscles quite often in this case steroid use is required. Unfortunately, during these remedies use, female sex hormones level is increased in the blood the quantity leading to breast enlargement by female pattern. To avoid these adverse effects of steroids Nolvadex or its analogues is indicated.<br />
Nolvadex taking depends on the purpose. To cure a cancer in women, it is recommended to take from 20 to 40mg of the drug once or twice a day. If Nolvadex is taken to treat infertility, the dose is only 10mg a day. In this case the treatment should be started on the 2nd day of menses and continued within four days.<br />
Depending on Nolvadex effect, men should take from 10 to 30mg a day. Start the treatment from the minimum dose and if required increase it.<br />
For convenience of use, Nolvadex is supplied in different dosage of pills: 10, 20 and 40mg.<br />
Nolvadex is a possibility to get rid of a cancer, however it helps only if disease has been diagnosed at an early stage. Besides, the treatment with Nolvadex should be combined with other medications, as a cancer is a very serious disease.</p>
<p><strong>Nolvadex Safety Information</strong><br />
Nolvadex is a drug designed to decrease female sex hormone level in the blood. It indirectly affects other hormones as well.<br />
Nolvadex has not been reported to cause many side-effects, however, they should be taken into consideration. Change of hormonal background may lead to vaginal bleeding. Dose should be adjusted in this case. In mild cases it may cause menstrual cycle disorder, or pudendal itching.<br />
Nolvadex may influence on the blood structure and lead to blood clot formation. To avoid it, the drug is not recommended for those who suffer from diseases of regions of inferior limb vessels.<br />
As the drug is supplied in pills, it may upset the stomach and intestines and to cause vomiting, constipation, or diarrheas, and also suppress appetite. Sometimes allergic reactions such as itching can be experienced. Nolvadex may cause decrease sexual desire in men.<br />
Nolvadex is strictly prohibited for pregnant, and breast-feeding women. The patients with diseases of eyes, changed structure of the blood, or blood diseases should use Nolvadex after consultation with the doctor and start the treatment from the lowest dosages.<br />
Sometimes Nolvadex may cause depression, drowsiness, and fatigue. It is associated with hormonal background changes. If these disorders disturb you seriously, drug use should be terminated and you are recommended to seek medical assistance.<br />
If you have read all contra-indications and are sure that you do not have any, you can order Nolvadex at our online pharmacy. You will not be required any prescription here. If you would like, you can consult the doctor before drug use.</p>
<p><strong>Nolvadex Side Effects</strong><br />
During <em>Nolvadex treatment</em> you are recommended to strictly follow the doctor’s instructions or drug leaflet as it significantly affects hormonal background. Only in this case you will achieve effect of Nolvadex use and avoid any side-effects.<br />
It should be noted that Nolvadex is strictly forbidden to be taken during breast-feeding and pregnancy as hormonal disorders may negatively affect the child.<br />
Nolvadex is counter-indicative in case of any allergic reactions irrespectively of symptoms.<br />
In addition, patients suffering from diseases of eyes, such as cataracts, or with high inclination to blood clot formation, should take extra care whilst Nolvadex treatment. Disorders of structure of blood, such as high cholesterol level, low leukocyte or platelet level, are considered to be contraindication for Nolvadex use.<br />
If you observe any reactions, immediately stop taking drug and visit the doctor. After examination, he will define if you can continue your treatment.<br />
Nolvadex is to be stored in a dry, dark place for five years at room temperature. To use the expired drug is strictly prohibited.</p>
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		<title>Can Men and Women Ever Really Relate To One Another?</title>
		<link>http://femalecare.net/relations/can-men-and-women-ever-really-relate-to-one-another/</link>
		<comments>http://femalecare.net/relations/can-men-and-women-ever-really-relate-to-one-another/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Mon, 25 Oct 2010 18:06:46 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Article Poster</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Relations]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[attempt]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[biological heritage]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[guiding lights]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[intimate partners]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[kinds of feminism]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Men]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[screen]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[sex]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[social mores]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Women]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://femalecare.net/?p=1034</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[When most men and women interact, they aren&#8217;t fully seeing each other for who they are because they&#8217;re peering through a screen of past history and beliefs about themselves and their gender identity. Some of these beliefs are culturally prescribed; others are the outgrowth of past experiences, and still others are the remnants of our [...]
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<li><a href='http://femalecare.net/relations/women-and-friendship/' rel='bookmark' title='Women and Friendship'>Women and Friendship</a></li>
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			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>When most men and women interact, they aren&#8217;t fully seeing each other for who they are because they&#8217;re peering through a screen of past history and beliefs about themselves and their gender identity. Some of these beliefs are culturally prescribed; others are the outgrowth of past experiences, and still others are the remnants of our biological heritage. Many cultures throughout history have experimented with numerous arrangements, from arranged marriages to polygamy, in an attempt to get the sexes functioning jointly without undue friction. But there&#8217;s a big difference between men and women behaving companionably according to social mores and them relating to each other from a place of being who they truly are.<span id="more-1034"></span></p>
<p>Most of us have had some disconcerting experiences with the opposite sex. We&#8217;re so accustomed to confusion, in fact, that popular axioms saying, essentially, &#8220;men/women are just that way and there&#8217;s no fathoming them&#8221; are accepted as the Gospel without much scrutiny. Resignation brings little satisfaction to either camp, though.</p>
<p>Can we dispense with the stereotypes and see each other plainly, learn to be allies instead of living in competition? In order to do that, we have to know ourselves well enough to see through the projections that we place on others. Projection basically means failing to own a part of one&#8217;s self &#8211; failing to recognize it &#8211; and perceiving it instead as a quality of someone else. Projection often occurs between intimate partners, which is why couples can break up, disillusioned, and wonder if they ever really knew each other.</p>
<p>There are numerous forms of projection. It can come from men who never were close to their fathers and grew up seeking women to be their guiding lights. It can come from women who look to men to be their saviors. Projection can assume an ugly face as a result of negative past experiences, expressing itself as misogyny in men and some of the more extreme kinds of feminism in women.</p>
<p>Only by exploring what is within them can men and women learn to relate to each other without defining themselves in terms of the other. A man has to know who he is before he can share himself with a woman; otherwise, he will inevitably become lost in her. There is a fine line between intimacy and dependency. What can discriminate between the two is a sense of one&#8217;s own worth. Men and women who look to the opposite sex to affirm their worth are already lost in projection.</p>
<p>The breakdown of traditional gender roles in our society has created a unique opportunity in history for men and women to be partners without sacrificing who they are. Taking advantage of this opportunity requires work, though: self-examination, and perhaps the healing of childhood wounds that may have created unrealistic expectations. For those of us who want to live empowered lives rather than dependent ones, however, this is a relatively small price to pay.</p>
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